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Thursday, May 10, 2012

This post has nothing to do with the sun

So the other night I noticed something creepy.  Whenever my cat wants to go out to relieve himself I usually head out with him to make sure theres no other cats waiting to fight him, as I have no desire to fork out any more money on vet bills.  So with my trusty GOD TORCH in hand I go out into the night.  They've been fairly cool lately which is really nice.  The best thing about cool nights is the skies usually clear, which means 1 billion stars greet me.  It always makes me want to go back and start writing stories again but then I remember I'm a slacker and so I dont.

While going down I noticed something glint off the torch light.  There, sitting on the side of the garden are 2 tree frogs a couple feet apart.  Just staring my way.  They're the only two there.  I know these frogs.  They used to live in the pipes we had where we planned to build an expensive to the house but havent gotten around to it, which we recently taped up so they couldnt get into anymore since they somehow made it into the bathroom through the pipes.  I could tell they were upset with me.  They should be thankful since taping it up stopped my dad from killing them.  But one thing I didnt know about frogs was if you shine a light into their eyes it reflects red.  So that was a little eerie.

So off to the back of the yard and my cats doing his thing.  I noticed a glinting reflection in the grass nearby and thought back to the stories I was told that those are lights reflecting off the eyes of spiders.  So I thought I'd lean in and OMG it was a spider, a fairly large one, and on its back was like a cocoon of eggs.  So I did the only thing I could.  And that was to crush it with my foot.  Of course I was terrified the entire time as I grind my foot into the floor to turn him into paste.  My mind kept imagining it somehow making its way to the side of my shoe, reaching over with legs that gripped into me like metal razors, then its head popping around and biting my toes off.  Sure this isnt going to happen.  But I really really hate spiders.

Heres a classic one for you.  Yesterday mum interrupted me to tell me that I needed to check the phone because its not working.  I'm like how is it not working.  She kept insisting.  So I finally get up and pick up the phone, dial tone is there, stare at mum.  And she says to me...  Its not working.  Try calling here, it wont work........  And I'm like....SERIOUSLY?!  You cant call the house phone from the house phone!


  1. This could've happened...

    1. Omfg I am not arachnophobic but that scared the FUCK out of me.

    2. haha that happened to a friend of mine. I heard him and his brother just freak out over the headset in the background. Laughed myself stupid.